Rebellious Confidence

The word fuck has endless meanings- fuck im scared, fuck what if I cant do this, fuuuuuuuck, fuck this is fun, fuck yes!, fuck I’m excited. It’s the one word that can embody self-doubt as well as extreme confidence. It can express intense pain and overwhelming happiness. It can come out when we don’t mean it or when we really do. It can be frustration and celebration. It’s the one word that does and says it all.

This word has had my back since I first uttered it. I guess it started as a fun way to be bad- it felt exciting to see what (and whose) buttons I could push.  But as I grew up and in my adult life this word is about so much more than being bad.

In the last year of my life- a year of new beginnings, big changes, and incredible challenges this word was certainly in heavy rotation. When I started to wear this necklace, even when it was covered by a shirt or jacket, it felt oddly comforting to know it was there. It was a layer to remind me to honor every feeling, good and bad, to study those moments, and to eventually emerge from them stronger.

I wear this to feel like me, to stay honest and challenged with every moment, with every situation, and to cultivate a rebellious confidence that just feels fucking great.


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